Friday, March 7, 2014

Indifferent


Hi sweethearts <3 

Sorry for not taking any new pictures with my camera and do a full blogpost as a regulary do. These past 2 weeks has been short updates with crappy webcam photos, so I apologise for that. I honestly don't have so much to blog about, like seriously, nothing has happened lately that is worth actually blogging about. I have just been at home, not doing anything, feeling kind of.. Indifferent. I don't feel like myself, I feel confused but I am not worried about it but I am not happy either, you know what I'm sayin? The best word to explain this feeling I am walking around with is "indifferent". I don't know how else to put it, I don't know why I feel the way I feel but I am starting to get tired of a lot of things here in life. Actually much more than usual, from almost care about things to not care about anything at all. I don't know if it is anxiety that is haunting me or depression.

I don't always have this weird feeling which is kind of funny to me, I guess I am tired of being treated like crap even though I let myself and led me into that. I do something that I know will be bad for me and yet I still go and do it and then pay for it. Does anyone have this strange behavior pattern or is it just me? Even I don't get it sometimes. I don't like to talk about myself, I hate it in fact. That is also why I go to a psychologist, even when I am there I never talk about my main problems that I really should do. I am afraid that she won't get it so that is why I don't even bother doing it.

That also explain a little bit about the bad updates, I will do better blogposts, so please be patient with me. I am bouncing back, if you have been following me here for a long time you will know that I always do that. It wil perhaps take some time, but I just really need to charge back my positive energy. I have been feeling so negative, more negative than usual and that is bad, even for me, lol. Those who know me will get this.
I really don't want to take it out on anyone but unfortunetly it does. I try to keep my blog a happy and positive place for you readers, I still appreciate that there is so many of you out there, still reading my blog even though it has been a little bit on the downside lately.

I love you all, I will still keep up with the updates, even though it might not be at my best but I will always have something for you to read/see. The better blogpost will be up as soon as I get back and feel better, I promise. <3


Today's look. Wearing my new elf mineral eyeshadows in Wild, Bronzed, Golden and Angelic. On the lips I am just wearing a plain chapstick. No foundation or filled eyebrows, all natural there. :)

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